Friday, June 13, 2014


So, my mother came by and she was making wonderful blueberry muffins, which basically smelled like what I imagine showering with the LORD would smell like. (Don't make it weird; I just need an analogy of awesomeness. Besides, the Weird is about to happen.)

So I was trying to compliment how amazing it smelled in the house, and I told her that her fresh out-of-the-oven muffins smelled "better than a fifteen-year old Vietnamese virgin." 

She laughed, but then a second later the full impact of my comparison hit her and she exclaimed: "Not funny!" 

But it was too late. She had laughed, and by the Ancient Code of the Muffin Society (specifically the 13th volume, 80th chapter and 7th verse) once my mother laughed, my outlandish and borderline illegal analogy was rendered accepted and most importantly: no Muffin Censure would come to my name. 

Rules is rules, yo.